What are anxious or avoidant attachments?

When you’re used to anxious or avoidant attachments, it’s like having a special kind of friendship that feels different from others.

Imagine you have two best friends: one is always right by your side, but sometimes worries too much and needs lots of reassurance. That's like an anxious attachment, you want someone close, but you also feel unsure if they'll stay or leave.

Now imagine the other friend is very independent, they’re fun to be with, but when things get tough, they tend to run off and do their own thing. That's like an avoidant attachment, you enjoy being near them, but you don’t always want to depend on them for support.

• With anxious attachments, it’s like having a toy that you really love, but sometimes it gets broken, and you worry it might not come back.
• With avoidant attachments, it's more like playing with a ball, it's fun to kick around, but when the game gets serious, you might just walk away for a while.

Both types of attachments are normal, they just mean your way of connecting with people feels a little different!